The choices are endless and confusing in the age of streaming

I was clicking through the various TV streaming services the other night looking for “House of Thrones” when I realized that there is no show called “House of Thrones”. The HBO prequel “Game of Thrones” is called “House of the Dragon. “

“Luckily it’s not ‘House of Thrones’,” I said to Ruth, my lovely wife. “Can you imagine how embarrassing that would be? A house full of thrones? You would run into them all the time.

Ruth made a sound like laughter, but maybe it wasn’t. Maybe you remembered when I briefly confused “House of Cards” with “Game of Thrones” 10 years ago and tried in vain to find “Game of Cards”.

“Of course, even one throne is bad enough,” I continued. “It’s made with a bunch of swords.”

I wonder about that throne. So dangerous. He forgets “Uncomfortable lies the head wearing a crown”. Restless is the bottom that sits on the throne!

Frankly, Westeros is an administration nightmare for occupational safety and health. Not a single eye wash station. No protective goggles on the dragon keepers. I doubt employers provide standing desks.

The Consumer Product Safety Commission would also have a field day. You think Game of Thrones is bad, cradles in the Seven Kingdoms are likely made of old razor blades and hypodermic needles.

Anyway, I like to visit. The show gives me a sense of perspective. Things are bad in America now – climate change, political turmoil, pandemics, a vast wealth gap – but at least people aren’t being inflamed by dragons. Yet!

These days, I find myself watching a lot of escapist television. I haven’t had time yet for JRR Tolkien’s new “Rings of Power” show on Amazon Prime. It seems to occupy a niche similar to “House of the Dragon”. Hope the two shows will do a crossover episode. With their blonde wigs, half the cast of “House of the Dragon” already looks like elves. (Oh, by the way, Amazon founder Jeff Bezos owns the Washington Post.)

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I’ve lost track of all the streaming services I’m subscribed to. Too many, probably. I have at least three who specialize in British shows: BritBox, Acorn and one from PBS who is very busy with “Masterpiece Theater”. Then there are Apple TV Plus, Hulu, Amazon Prime and Netflix.

This can’t be sustainable, can it? And the other day I was looking at my Netflix subscription and I noticed with horror that I paid $ 10 a month for DVD rental. I haven’t watched a Netflix DVD in two years. I canceled it right away.

All those shoots – all those shows – and when we stand in front of the idiot box it still takes 20 minutes to decide what to watch.

We like foreign programs – German Cold War shows are a current infatuation – but if we’re eating in front of the TV we don’t want anything with subtitles. (I don’t want to miss any dialogue as I look at my plate for another forkful of food.)

There are only so many prestige miniseries that we can follow at a time. I can’t remember the names of all my cousins ​​let alone the names and backstories of all the characters in yet another dystopian science fiction show. We have to finish the previous one dystopian science fiction program before launching into the next one.

And, of course, there is the mood. Do we want something to help us relax or to cheer us up? Do we want thoughts to be provoked or thoughts dulled? Do we want to laugh or do we want to cry? Do we want short violence, no violence or excessive and gratuitous violence? Do we want a lot of nudity or do we want people to keep their clothes on for once?

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Or do we want baseball? That too has become complicated. The other day I wanted to watch a baseball game and it was on YouTube. It is allowed?

You know, maybe I should just read a book.

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